RIghts vs Responsibilities

We are doing a marriage series at church. It has been great. This past Sunday we listened to a podcast by Perry Noble. He is a very interesting speaker and I love his message deliverance. His message was entitled are you fighting in your marriage or for your marriage. It was really good. There was one part particularly that has just stuck with me. He asked if we focus on our rights or focus on our responsibilities? There is so much to unpack with that question. If you look at American culture, it is definitely a "rights" based people. Obviously I believe in civil rights, and am not referring to human equality.
I am speaking of our basic responsibilities as Christ followers, wives, mothers and people that juggle numerous relationships. To ponder this rights vs responsibilities challenge I think looking at it backwards works best.
As friends, we have the "right" to cut people off when they harm us, when something cuts deep and we can no longer trust or feel as if the relationship is viable, but what if our responsibilities looked different? As mothers we have the "right" to allow or children to act out, or overwhelms us, or take our focus off God and our husbands because our world revolves around them, but what are our responsibilities? And as a wife, biblically, there are rights we could cling to when our husbands "fail" in certain ways, but what are our responsibilities? And finally, what are our "rights" as Christ followers? This actually answers each and every one of these rights vs responsibility questions. This is not the feel good answer, this is not the popular answer, nor is this an american culture answer this is the answer that brings forth restoration. This is the answer that changes us to the core of who we are and how we view every person we encounter. What if we viewed our lives as opportunities to be molded into the likeness of the One we  claim to believe in? Yes we grasp forgiveness, and we grasp being kind, maybe even loving our enemies, but do we grasp suffering to become like Christ?  Scripture has a lot to say about our suffering. it says we are going to suffer, and even further in that we are molded to BE like Christ through our own suffering. I do not believe that we are like Christ aside from suffering. We may experience His love and forgiveness, His kindness and compassion, but to truly be like Him we must suffer. This is certainly not what is commonly taught, but this is what God has shown me. The scriptures say in 
Philippians 3:10
I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in His sufferings, becoming like him in his death.       


Colossians 1:24
Now I rejoice in what I am suffering for you, and I fill up in my flesh what is still lacking in regard to Christ’s afflictions, for the sake of his body, which is the church. 


2 Thessalonians 1:5
All this is evidence that God’s judgment is right, and as a result you will be counted worthy of the kingdom of God, for which you are suffering


2 Timothy 1:12
That is why I am suffering as I am. Yet this is no cause for shame, because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him until that day.


Suffering in marriage is not a popular thought process. We can easily divorce, in fact its encouraged in many cases. This week i want to break down why we self preserve. Why suffering is considered something we avoid, and how restorative changing that perspective can be. This is an area that God has totally transformed my mind with. It can be transforming to your relationship, but more importantly to the very being of who you are in Him. It is very difficult, but well worth the end result.